Monday 23 April 2012

FRIDAY FICTIONEERS - 20 April 2012 - AH - My 100 Words - Sussan De Allura

Ah...
         Ah, to be alone at last on this glorious morning!  Nature awakening me.  Oh, it feels so good to be away...
         That was the last thought I had before I felt a stunning blow from behind, the breath forced out of me as we crashed to the ground, my hair being savagely pulled and twisted, my head smashed into the no longer peaceful earth.
         My eyes fixed on a lovely little mossy place trickling drops of water...it smelled so sweet! I just fell into it, got lost in it, became it.          
          Everything else I was before, I am not now…


6 comments:

  1. I get the impression she was killed in this vicious little scene. Great job at relaxing us and then smashing us around! Thanks for joining us...and did you really win the lottery??

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahahahahahahah! thanks! I did, I would have thought 10K was soooooooooooooo much $$. it spends really fast. Can lightning strike twice? I hope so.. Sussan here.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow, really good story Ms Allura, and a tremendous last line.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Carlos. Glad you liked it. I pondered long and hard if I should include that last line. I almost took it out. I felt it to be a very personal line..a little too close to the bone..so for that reason I felt I MUST use it. I want to get close to the bone, it's thrilling...

      Sussan

      Delete
  4. The switches in mood were crafted perfectly, for a short piece like this. I really liked this, didn't see it last week.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you very much Sandra!
    Yes, I am new and having a bit of difficulty making things work right. Again I would love to read some of yours can you send a link.

    Sussan

    ReplyDelete